The Passover Song

(With apologies to Adam Sandler)

Passover is, our Exodus strategy,
Instead of fish in April, we get no bread for a week.
So if you feel like the only kid in town, without an egg to paint,
Here's a list of baseball players who are Jewish, just like Pete Rose ain't....

Scott Schoeneweis puts charoset on his maror
So does Jason Marquis and Phillies G.M. Rube Amaro.
Guess who ate a Pascal lamb with Flip and Goody Rosen?
Sandy Koufax, Moe Drabowsky, and Saul Ro-govin!
 
Brad Ausmus is all-Jewish.
Harry Danning spoke Hebrew.
Put them together, what a fine looking Two!
We've got Barry Latman, and Brian Horwitz too,
Moe Berg spoke 10 languages, like Yiddish with Rod Carew!

When you look at an MLB roster, you wonder who and which are,
Like which Dave Roberts was the Jew, the third baseman or the pitcher? (the latter)
Ron Blomberg's known as the first designated hitter.
But he never made error on his Birkat after dinner!

So many Jews are in baseball:
Buddy Myer, Ryan Braun, and Michael Lieberthal!

Last year Ryan Kalish was Boston's best rookie,
The other Sox had Aaron Poreda, but he got traded for Jake Peavy (not Jewish),
There's been few Jews on the South Side, since Radinsky was their hurler
The Browns are now in Baltimore, but they once had a "Yiddish Curver!"

People say that teams don't care 'bout Jews who swing for fence-ia
But the Twins lost two "piranhas" to make room for Dan Valencia!

The Dodgers won in '59 backstopped by Norman Sherry,
He's Jewish, but not the MVP; that was his brother Larry!
Kevin Youkilis made his momma cry, when he brought home a shikse.
J.J. Putz is actually a goy, but not José Bautista!

Chicagoans will tell you, Harry Caray's overblown,
Well he's not Jewish, but his booth mate was: underrated Steven Stone.

We've got Theo Epstein, the Sox's pestlkhokhem
And also Lipman Pike, an original Red Stockin'.
Scott and Harry Feldman, John Grabow and Lou Boudreau
All tell bubbe meises to Ian Kinsler and Craig Breslow!

Mose Hirschel Solomon was called 'Rabbi of Swat'
Morrie Arnovich kept Kosher all his life, unlike Harry Eisenstat.
Guess whose mother offered to make 61 gefilte fish?
Hammerin' Hank Greenberg - even though he hated it!

So if you're down because you think you're not a major leaguer,
Remember Erskine Mayer, Calvin Abrams, and Steve Yeager!
Come to the Pesach table, and tell how lord did save us,
And hide the afikomen from young Mets slugging 3 Ike Davis!

Guess which Tiger blogger, drinks four cups of Pesach wine?
No I'm not talking about Ian Casselberry, I'm talking about Miss Samara Pearlstein!

So many Jews on a Big League bench:
Sean Casey isn't, but we think he's quite the mensch!

When you set out the seder plates, save room for Al Levine,
And when you dip your karpas, shed tears with ol' Shawn Green.
Think on old Art Shamsky, and Richie Scheinblum,
And Gabe Kapler and Adam Stern, the all-Jewish platoon.

Remember Sid Gordon was a Yid, and Ken Holzman was one too,
And Fuld and Fingleson, and Mike Epstein, were Jewish, just like you!

So fill that-there wine glass-over, it's time to celebrate Passover,
Invite that lovely lass over, for a lovely lovely Passover
Park your car by Cass-over, and walk toward that CoPa grass-over,
Until you get that leavened fast over, 
Have a Happy, Happy, Happy, Happy Passover!