What would you say you do around here?

Don Kelly used to be a sort of "jack of all trades" and that was cool. He'd play every position. They even let him pitch once. But this year, Kelly's space got more and more crowded. Prince at first, Cabrera at third, Dirks, Garcia in the outfield. His world was shrinking. Then they got this Baker guy and moved Kelly to the basement in Toledo.

TPS reports

.186 average, .276 on base percentage, .248 slugging pct, .523 OPS, one home run, 7 RBI, 2 steals in 116 at bats. I didn't set the world on fire, but I could set the building on fire!

Pieces of flair

Kelly did hit one flair to right field against Oakland that sacrificed in the walk-off game-winning run in the league championship series. That, and he hit better than Ryan Raburn. So, that's something, right?

I believe you have my stapler

Llegendary Lloyd said that Kelly'd have to correct his swingline if he was to stay in the major leagues. Kelly's swingline is top of the line, not to be messed with.

Office Space-esque quote:

"I'll take my traveler's checks to a competing resort."