"Joel Zumaya's arm was treated for burns on his pitching hand. While attending Glen Perkins' meat smoking tutorial in the concourse, he reached through the grill to grab burning coals as Perkins had his back turned. When asked why he reached for the orange, glowing coals, Zumaya sighed and answered: 'I don't even know anymore.' "
Seriously, what is wrong with this guy?
FYI, this is just satire. Great post though. --Rob