Donnie Deeds

USA TODAY Sports

What Don Kelly lacks in baseball skills he more than makes up for in manners.

By all accounts Don Kelly is a gem of a guy. Sure, he can struggle with the bat sometimes, but what kind of monster could possible criticize the guy for that? After all, what is more important during our short time on this crazy planet than thoughtfulness and right living?

A month or two ago on Twitter I thought it was important to let people know about his manners. Whenever Donnie would do something good I would remind people like this:

Don Kelly singles up the middle, puts an item back in it's proper place in the store when he decides not to buy it.

The format is simple: [good thing Donnie did on the field] + [comma] + [Donnie Deed].

What exactly is a Donnie Deed? It is not heroic or supernatural like a Jason Beck/Chuck Norris Fact and is less social than Good Guy Greg. It's just something that thoughtful, polite people like Don Kelly do.

Pretty soon I was feeling the pressure to come up with something new every time Don did something good. Luckily for me Don is thoughtful enough not to make that too frequent.

After a while people on twitter were all pitching in. I was flooded with suggestions, a hashtag was born (#donniedeeds), and someone even created an account (@donniedeeds).

@ProfessorDoel on Twitter suggested that I create a comprehensive list. I don't know if I'll get them all, but here are some of my favorites. Most of these are mine, but if they are not I'll try to credit the person who suggested it. If I miss yours please know that there are lots of repeats and/or I just didn't see it. (* = good thing Don did on the field)

  • *, remembers your kids names.
  • *, let's you go in front of him in the supermarket checkout because you only have a couple of items.
  • *, always remembers to switch off his high-beams when an oncoming car approaches.
  • *, leaves his cart in the store and just carries his groceries to the car by hand. (@craiggrossom)
  • *, always remembers to spray after doing his business.
  • Don Kelly golfs a home run, fixes three ball marks on the green.
  • Don Kelly golfs a home run, patiently explains to the waitress what an Arnold Palmer is.
  • *, places his utensils on his plate before the server comes to pick it up.
  • Don Kelly starts the game, your car for you on a cold winter day.
  • *, sees you have a pack of gum but doesn't ask you for a piece.
  • *, donates blood regularly.
  • *, visits his grandmother and patiently switches the input on her TV back to cable so she can watch TV again.
  • *, eats the yellow mento and lets you have the pink one.
  • *, prepares his deposit before pulling into the line at the bank drive through.
  • Don Kelly saves a home run, box tops for his local school.
  • *, doesn't accept your offered gas money payment. (@sean_zorn)
  • Don Kelly pinch running, getting your mail for you while you are on vacation.
  • *, doesn't use a fake name for his order at Starbucks.
  • *, fills your truck with gas when he borrows it.
  • *, dances with the flower girl at his wedding. (@Flyin_DutchmanX)
  • *, leaves his campsite better than when he found it.
  • *, calls the pizza place to make the complicated order on guys' night. (@craiggrossom)
  • *, never looks in your medicine cabinet when using your bathroom when he visits.
  • *, remembers to take the lime out of the Corona bottle before recycling it.
  • *, picks up his house before the cleaning lady comes.
  • *, logs you out of Facebook after you use his laptop. (@adusman)
  • *, calls a foul on himself in a pickup game (@David_G_Collins)

Have more? Leave them in the comments below.

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