Coke'd: the fans on Twitter have spoken (sort of)

Kyle Terada-USA TODAY Sports

Phil Coke has fallen out of almost everyone's good graces, it seems, as this Twitter search revealed. (I hope I did the search right.)

Phil Coke blew hard last night. After striking out the first two batters he faced, he started giving up hits, then he started giving up runs, then he - the team LOOGY, mind you - gave up a home run to left-handed hitting Adam Dunn.

I think everyone is frustrated at this point, and to confirm that fact, I went out to Twitter and just a quick search for "Coke." The results were definitely ... results.

Exactly, sir, exactly. Phil Coke belongs in the amateur champions league, whatever that might be. I could not agree with you more. Well stated. But how did you know that Phil Coke loves pizza?

Ok, Connor, interesting metaphor you're using there. I'm not sure I totally understand it, but I think we're still on the same page here as far as saying that Phil Coke is not really healthy for anyone.

Wow, Jim, way to really reach for sheer poetry there. Still, you've got the basic idea of it - Phil Coke should not be anywhere within sniffing distance of the Tigers, unless they want to get the Ice Cubes of Earned Runs stuck in the Nose of their Soon-to-be Victory.

Now we're talking, Adam. Phil Coke is probably better suited to be working at a local McDonald's, where they actually expect him to serve up lots of runs. And when customers at the counter ask what's on the Dollar Menu, he can just point straight up.

Yes, yes, exactly, I see where you're heading with this. Phil Coke causes uncontrollable vomiting, something something something about acid, and acid is definitely not good, so I think we're in agreement here also.

You would, stoner. You would.

So as we can all see, the fans on Twitter have spoken, they have registered their opinion concerning Phil Coke, and that opinion is: pizza, unhealthy, ice cubes up the nose, McDonald's, and vomiting.

Your move, Tigers.

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