FanPost

A Tigers half-season, in haiku

Joe Nicholson-USA TODAY Sports

After Sunday's 7-1 loss to the Twins to take us to the All-Star break, the BYB recap had a bunch of haikus in it. I figured a story of the first half, in haiku form, would be fun and challenging. So here we go:

New Tigers Season!
Optimism in the air
World Series Bound

Brad, back at the helm
Got a season under him
Sexy manager

Incredible start
Putting the league on notice
Hear the Tigers Roar

Even lacking JV
Rotation was still solid
Greene and Pasta shone

Then it began, cracks
Unraveling at the seams
Sliding ever downwards

Inconsistency
Dingers and TOOTBLANs, oh my
Double plays are bad

That great start? A myth
Injuries, slumps, bad pitches
Mediocrity

And now for a look
At the state of the Tigers
Can't be that bad right?

Our defense is nice
Iggy flashes the leather
Cannon arms abound

Cespedes throws home
Laser is on-line, he's OUT
You ran on him? HA!

Romine quietly
has become a new Donnie
Ian's still got range

Gose/Davis platoon
JD Mart's now COUNTRY STRONG
Outfield has been fun

Miggy's not human
Was on an M-V-P pace
Heal fast superman

Speaking of hurt guys
Victor's back; watch out baseball
laughably awesome

Danny got a shot
Lost Hernan to the Brew Crew
Wilson does what now?

Avila hurt? Shock
The McCannon is lethal
Pitch framing? Uh-oh

Nick's sophomore slump
Had the fans demanding trades
Defense way better

Starting pitching's rough
Price mows em down, Simon frowns
Greene's Toledo bound

JV seems to be
back to his old self, maybe?
Sanchez, who knows man?

Ryan, Lobstein, Buck
tried to fill in for awhile
couldn't get it done

Bullpen, dumpster fire
Though Wilson has been a steal
Save us please, Feliz

Nesbitt here and there
Soria's got Home Run fears
Krol is laughable

Nathan is long gone
Rondon and Al Al might work
Hardy could be great

Gonna miss Joba
That beard was just wonderful
Gorzo, what happened?

Team full of All-Stars
Yet sitting at five hundred
Hard to fathom, right?

Tigers are known as
A second-half team to fear
Question is, this time?

To buy or to sell?
That is the hot stove topic
Who? Where? How much? Bye!

In DD we trust
Good luck at this trade deadline
Easy? Not a chance

To restore the Roar
This team needs to find itself
No fence-sitting, eh?

This is a FanPost and does not necessarily reflect the views of the <em>Bless You Boys</em> writing staff.