Onion Sports is kind of a hit-or-miss proposition on most days (here's a story that hit, in my opinion), not nearly as funny as the "regular news" wing of the operation, but usually good for a few giggles. One of their stories today isn't comic gold, but since we're dealing in all things Detroit Tigers here, it's worth noting when our guys get some attention.
And we could probably use a chuckle or two after the Tigers were officially eliminated (in an appropriately rain-shortened game) last night, wouldn't you say?
Polanco reportedly shrugged, saying, "That's pretty good, but picture this: right-handed pitcher, day game, on turf, full count, and...runners on first and second. This way, the runners are off with the pitch, and the first baseman would be shading the line to protect against the extra-base hit, so bam, I just punch it right through the hole. Oh, oh, and what about the old one-out, 1-1 count hit-and-run? Can't go wrong with a classic."
I think a scenario with Maggs and Polly staying up all night, with Polly brushing Maggs' hair and Maggs giving Polly a temple massage would've been much funnier. But maybe that's just me.
And just to clarify, I hadn't visualized such a scenario until I wrote it just now. I'm just trying to entertain you people.