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Game 98 Overflow: Tigers at Twins

 

What’s happened so far:

  • Justin Verlander worked around a Michael Cuddyer leadoff triple in the 2nd inning.
  • Jhonny Peralta’s RBI single gave the Tigers a 1-0 lead in the 4th.
  • Wilson Betemit is hitting a robust .500 as a Tiger and already has more hits than Brandon Inge in the month of July.
  • Brennan Boesch hit a home run that landed on top of Ford Field (and yes, the game is in Minnesota) in the 5th, extending the Tigers’ lead to 3-0.
  • The Tigers added two runs in the 6th on a Peralta RBI double and Carlos Guillen sac fly.

Topics from previous thread:

  • Bad Wilson Betemit puns
  • Figuring out what "ingress" and "gable" mean
  • Molly Ringwald
  • Bad puns about everything
  • Figuring out how to say "Betemit"
  • Puppies and ice cream

Best joke ever, via Misopogon of MGoBlog:

So three guys from Detroit go to hell. The Devil's walking around doing his rounds to make sure everyone's getting the proper amount of torture and finds the Detroit guys sitting out in the open, drinking beers, grilling, and generally smiling at the hell fires.

The Devil is like "what are you guys doing?" and the three Detroit guys calmly explain that they're from Michigan, the land of snow and ice; when you get a warm day you gotta enjoy it.

So the Devil decides to turn the heat way, way up in that sector – enough to melt the rock – and moves on. Later he figures the Detroiters are good and cooked, and goes back to check on them, only to see them out in the middle of the lake of fire, having found a bunch of motor boats and tied them together, drinking and sunning themselves and fishing. The Devil's like WTF and the Detroiters explain again about the snow and ice and enjoying a nice day.

So the Devil's like I gotta screw these guys: He turns the temp way down, to absolute zero. And after enough time he comes back to check on the Detroit guys and there they are throwing a huge party, screamin', hollerin' whoopin', and just celebrating like crazy. The Devil's is apoplectic: "What the HERE guys?"

And they all look at him blankly like this should be obvious and are like "Dude: Hell froze over."

Devil: "Yeah?"

"The Lions must've won the Superbowl!"