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When snooping around the stadium long after the players had left, as is my tradition, an important discovery was made. In the waste bin outside the locker room was a small notebook. Dusty, ripped, and smelling of smoke, it certainly appeared to be trash. But not to an experienced blogger. I was drawn to the notebook, and not just due to my astute journalistic instinct. The aura of the tattered booklet was overwhelming. There was no description on the first page, but instead a sketching of man with whose beard seemed to intertwine with surrounding foliage of a forest. The next page featured an incredibly graphic drawing of a Walmart on fire. And finally, a VW van, flying into the moonlight Magic School Bus style.
Beyond these pictures, were pages with single sentences. Sentences of great importance. And after three months of living by these sentences, we here at Bless You Boys thought it was too important not to share. Below you will find, what we have donned, the Tao of Norris. May it serve you as it has served us.
You can't judge a van by its color
You can judge a man by his beard
The surf board is mightier than the sword
The hike of a thousand miles begins with a single vegan granola bar
The avalanche doesn't fall far from the mountain
If you don't have anything nice to say, don't kill my vibe bro
A slider is just a curveball that has not yet self-actualized
Good things come to those who shop at Patagonia
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Teach a man to fish and you will feed him for his lifetime. Teach a man to fish sustainably and you will be saving the ecosystem, stopping extinction, and helping level set conservation efforts that have been so far ineffective.
Early bird gets the choice hemp.
If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go with a Volkswagen Van with an adjustable roof.
Necessity is the mother of manhole cover bicep curls.