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Here's how MLB can attract a younger fan base

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The average baseball fan is an Old, so we'd like to offer a few ... helpful ... tips for MLB to reach younger fans.

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Jim Brown-USA TODAY Sports

Major League Baseball has historically been very resistant to change. We don't need to get into the ugly details, but the result is a game that many consider "too slow," "outdated," and, for lack of a better term, "old." Their viewership reflects that; according to Bob Nightengale of the USA Today, the average fan watching a nationally televised baseball game last year was 56 years old.

MLB commissioner Rob Manfred is trying to change that. Manfred will meet with teams, executives, and players throughout the spring to discuss potential changes that will increase baseball's appeal to a younger generation. Nightengale suggests radical ideas like starting every inning with a runner on first base, while Joel Sherman of the New York Post wants to limit timeouts. Hardball Talk's Craig Calcaterra thinks making the game more accessible is the right way to go, not changing the rules.

Sorry, guys. That's not going to cut it. In order to appeal to a younger generation, you have to think like a younger generation. We asked our youth contingent -- a.k.a. the two staff members under the legal drinking age -- for their input on how baseball can become more marketable. We're sure these ideas will be a home run (pun intended). (Kids these days like puns, right?)

  • LED-enhanced bases capable of displaying emojis
  • Instant replay to be replaced with EDM dance-offs
  • Lineups determined by fan vote via a Tinder-style app. Swipe right for Miggy!
  • DRONES
  • Bat flips to be replaced with dabs and other rap dance moves that white people don't understand
  • Bullpen changes will be made via Snapchat stories
  • DAD HATS

  • MORE FUTURE
  • Uniform numbers to be replaced with QR codes
  • Minecraft stadiums (may also appeal to Lynn Henning)
  • BAT FLIP DERBY

You're welcome, baseball.